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Showing posts from May, 2006

Insomnia

I pride myself on my ability to sleep in an infinete number of situations and places. Everything from consistent comfort on airplanes to complete out cold-ness on a sheet on a hospital floor.

And here I am at my dad's fiance's and I can't feel tired for the life of me. A comfy bed, a TV with channels that go higher than I can count at this time of night, and a laptop with internet. And I can't fall asleep.

When we first arrived in Perrysburg I told Robin I had a craving for fruit, were those cartons of strawberries on the counter up for grabs, I am a shameless craver right now. Turning her back to me she opens the fridge door and this light so bright and pure emanates from it so that I can't look into it. As I'm averting my eyes from whatever holiness is in her fridge, I sense the light shifting and as I look into Robin's outstretched hands I see...a pound of cherries.

First off, I love cherries. Passionately. Second, I work at a grocery store so I know what t…

Weirdly Wonderful

Life is weird

That's really all there is to it. It's unpredictable, funny, horrible, amazing, quirky, and full of the most incredible surprises.

Here is an account of something catalogued under AMAZING and INCREDIBLE SURPRISE:

At church yesterday I got my customary doting by a guy friend of mine who has the biggest most obvious crush on me. He's a good guy, he knows I've got a boyfriend, and he knows that I know about his crush. But this high school sophomore kid is still one of my good friends and always funny to hang with. At times his adoring attention makes me feel bad, because I really want him to have a good relationship with a good gal some day (but odds are that gal isn't gonna be me) and I don't wanna distract him from that. But for now he and I are simply good friends, and I guess I'll time take care of the rest.

But being on his mind all the time has its big payoffs, and not just in flattery.

I was in the lobby not 60 seconds when I feel a body purpos…

I Heart Comments

Well, to my two commentors who sound so aggressive in my (or their) defense, and other people interested, to clarify that last entry is about that one person I tried to be friends with again whom I had extreme doubts about. Well, my doubts were crystallized several weeks ago and that's that. No reason or explanation, just an ugly meltdown among my circle of friends.

The swell of drama was over and out of curiousity I went to his blog to see his status, because he never minces his opinion. The entry had nothing to do with me, but I felt a tug to leave something. Knowing how highly he values Scripture I picked out some verses and left the references, reluctant to hit the "post" button and possibly turn the key that unlocked another Pandora's box. But I felt that tug again, and clicked with gritted teeth.

I wanted to be afraid, to go back and delete it, but felt that tug a third time to let the stone I threw in the water rest and ripple as it might. And there have been ri…

Armageddon

There was one CSI episode (no idea which city it was in, though, there's way too many to remember) that captivated me. A very young female investigator helped in the case of a murdered 19-year-old girl. Of course, in the end they caught the perpetrator, but on physical evidence alone. They could not find a shred of motive for him to do it. In the interrogation room, she looked at him and asked "Why did you do it?" Remaining silent, already convicted beyond rescue, he called out to be retrieved, that he was done talking to the detective.

Then, a week later, she came down to the prison, a haunted glow in her face. She arranged for him to come down to the phone booths, and he started with an ugly twisted smile when he saw who it was. Pressing the handpiece tight to her ear, she pleaded with him on the verge of tears "Please...I need to know why you did this..."

Lacking emotion except for the hint of a self-gratifying sneer, he said "You came all the way down he…

An Advertisement for "Death Cab for Cutie"

"In a place where we only say goodbye
It stung like a violent wind
That our memories depend
On a faulty camera in our minds
And I knew that you were a truth
I would rather lose
than to have never lain beside at all"


In Death Cab for Cutie's song "What Sarah Said" from their new cd Plans this bit jumped out at me. The song smacks of my Easter experience in the first place, and then this insightful lyricism slides into my ears and waits for me to comtemplate it.

oh the wonders of lyric poetry...

A Matt Sandwich

I really want to write due to a recent inspiration, but I'm not sure what to write about aside from the inspiration itself. That or the man in the kilt who came into Giant Eagle but that's more a comic moment than an actual story.

Yesterday Columbus State (my college) had this big thing set up on the center of the grounds they called the "Spring Fling". It was like a miniature carnival almost, and would've been amazing if it hadn't started to rain just as they set everything up...giant inflatable slides and mazes... brightly colored jewelry and shirt stands....hawking army and marine and air force men hustling young men into their areas eager to recruit them...even the atheist's club had a table set up (which I had to resist the temptation to hassle)...and a hot dog/bratwurst/roasted corn stand. Bumping into my good friend Josey from my old church (New Life); she and Matt and I were a threesome back in the last year of high school. It's still a threeso…

The Moral Of The Story

--Every morning I have math class; I take the Davidson Hall set of elevators to my third floor classroom, and that's my half-conscious routine. However, this past week and the week before, the second elevator has been inexplicably out of order, reducing the load of students per "ding" noticeably. Fed up with waiting until the second wave, I took to the stairs, grumbling and griping in my non-morning-person mood. To my surprise, a motley handful of college kids craned their necks my direction and asked "Hey - you got 5 minutes?" Another glance betrayed the sight of a video recorder clenched in the fist of a mop-topped boy, and the wide young man who first greeted me launched into his explanation. "We're shooting a short film for our Video/Audio class and I'm the lead guy who's cheating on his girlfriend."

"Do I really look like the cheating-on-girlfriend type?"

He laughed. "Just sit and talk with me and say whatever - there'…

Thinking

It's a defining moment in one's life where, instead of diving upon a clover patch, you can stroll by and say "I'll leave the luck for someone else - i've got plenty."