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Mixed Feelings

So I got a message from what I thought was a former friend. I really don't have any idea what the hell he is right now, or how I should respond to him.

He and I used to be the closest of close, and then he got in a bad mood and shut me out. A little while later, we picked stuff back up again after a tearful and apologetic reunion. A few months and one ruined practical joke later, I became a scapegoat and he shut me out again. That hurt - mostly because I felt wrongly accused. I haven't heard from him since, and suddenly he's trying to connect with me again, claiming a change in heart. I have a hard time believing him - that was what he said last time. If you're reading this, I'm not doing this to spite you, but to process you and get advice from my friends. Can you blame me for not knowing what to do with you exactly?

He sent me a message through facebook and then told me about a pivotal blog entry he had - I read it, and now I'm interested in at least one conversation with him. That conversation will decide whether another will follow, never mind a shred of the friendship we once possessed. My reluctance is clanging in my head and my better judgement is screaming to leave it be, that it's not worth the effort...but I figure, what could one conversation hurt? I might get upset, and the worst that could happen is I could firmly decide that this new version of him is something I never want any part of ever again, especially if he believes himself better this time around.

The Bible says stuff like "70 times 7" and "if your brother sins against you 7 times in one day and comes back to you for forgiveness each time, you should forgive him" - but is this a matter of forgiveness? What is this anyways? Everything here will be muddled until we discover each other's viewpoints - I'm trying really hard to be more objective in this than lashing out, but that gets tricky. I could just be asking for more friendship drama I've breathed easier without.

But it's worth the one conversation...right?

Comments

Deb said…
If he's reaching out like this, I'd probably give him the benefit of the doubt. At least this one (last) time.
8/2/06 7:47 PM
Anonymous said…
I can understand your stand point (if its me you are talking about dont keep reading)anyways us guys ain't the best with words and can't take some thing in a way because thing seem to register differt and (from my own experiances)that we mean to make things right but we mess up in some way and and then can't admit that we messed up so then the other person is hurt, but on the other side of the coin the benifit of the doudt on the three strike rule seem to work but some times there is a line that if you cross that "hey you pushed it to far" so one conversation cant hurt.....right?
over and out trukers
8/2/06 9:08 PM
Anonymous said…
I say one conversation to decide things is a good idea. You can forgive him, but that doesn't mean that you have to continue to be treated badly. One convewrsation is a good idea. Go for it chica
9/2/06 11:00 AM
~heather said…
thanks for the loving advice everyone!

and no, Nate, it's not you, scout's honor. You have ALWAYS been a very good friend, thanks for that.

thanks again!!
9/2/06 5:46 PM
Anonymous said…
kk good i'm glad to here that!!!

I had something like your situation once and I said the the guy "have it your way" and well that 1 less frind for me.

Well on another note !The Weekend Is Here! well allmost the school has proclamed a rally day of no work! and then saturday is Payday!

Well i got 4 essays due on the 14th and two portfolilo<--(Not in rednek vocabulary so i cant spell it)pices on the 13th so i git to hit the pencil and paper
Over and out trukers
~Nate the....
9/2/06 6:47 PM
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